English Development (A Joke)
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the EU rather than German, the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's government conceded that English spelling had room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would be known as Euro-English.
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c"....
Sertainly this will make the sivil servants jump for joy.
The hard "c" will be also dropped in favor of the "k".
This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 1 less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with the "f".
This will make words like "fotograph" 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always been a deterrent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of the silent "e's" in the language is disgraceful, and they should go away.
By the 4th year, peopl will be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dopd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
After zis fifz year, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.
ZE DREAM VIL FINALI KUM TRU !!!!!
