if you believe, go ahead.  If you hv doubt, give up.  No need to check, waste the time and money.
I paid more than 100K to her without any checking.

everyone has the standard to treat things.

The standard of friend (he/she) for me has a bottom line, beyond the bottom line, i will say sorry to him/her. (your affordable amount, if it is money concern).  I don't think you will check your friend about the reason of requesting money.

If he/she is your boy/girl friend, the standard for me will be higher.  I will put more effort to get involve into his/her matter (but not check whether it is true or not)

If he/she is your family members, the standard is the highest.  What you can do, you will do.


So, pls think about your standard before.

引用:

原帖由 COMMIN 於 2008-5-14 05:53 發表
錢可以要, 但不要過份.  我就是想知道她是什麼一回事, 好讓我走得心安理得.

are u pretending be a rich man, so that she keep on asking you?

What is the meaning of "過份" in your standard? eg, you salary is 10K (if she know), and she ask for 100K,
then is it "過份" in your standard?

引用:

原帖由 COMMIN 於 2008-5-14 07:32 發表
我不是個有錢人, 但在經濟上還可有點鬆動(就是有點鬆動才可讓我出來玩).  "過份"就是遠超一個普通國內人的生活開支.

The concept is not correct, for example if you hv a US friend ask you for 100K for 生活費, then you can
accept.  If she is from china, you cannot accept.

If she keep on asking you, and she knows your situation, then you need to tell her the truth.  After telling her the truth, she refuse to get along with you, then i think you can easily to forget her.  (but not
checking on her).

引用:

原帖由 COMMIN 於 2008-5-14 07:48 發表

內裡有太多千絲萬縷的因素, 在此很難詳細地說.  講到尾我就是不想擔那麼大的責任, 因為她有太多不明朗的問題而令我反思是否直得去為好付出那麼多.

"講到尾我就是不想擔那麼大的責任" means you don't trust her; you don't love her.
she ask you that amount (over your standard) means she don't trust you (you hv no more money);
she don't love you.

引用:

原帖由 COMMIN 於 2008-5-14 08:07 發表

所以我一直懷疑我是否真的愛她.  但愛不是盲目的, 我想我也是一個有理性的人, 當付出遠超出了底線後, 我便要反思是否直我得去繼續.

Now, this is not the matter of how much you love her, but the truth is she do not love you.

引用:

原帖由 COMMIN 於 2008-5-14 08:14 發表

"愛", 我相信她是愛我的.  但那是一時三刻的愛還是恆井傮Q知.

your thinking is too complicated, even in hk, when people get married, still cannot garantee.  It depends
on how much effort BOTH OF YOU make, not just you, or just her.

"Time" is really a good medicine, although it is very old fashioned, it is true.
Now, i still email with my ex-MM, she does not ask me for any money.  she become my friend like in other
countries.